The benefit of curiosity

I do a job where curiosity is thankfully a core requirement. That sense of ‘I don’t know yet’ can be exciting and stimulating, and is crucial for effective psychotherapy.

Every client is unique, with their own individual experience and ways of perceiving the world.  For sure there are patterns and themes and knowing this is a very useful side to navigating the complexities of mental health and well-being.  Finding the balance of holding knowledge of patterns in human experience not too tightly and not too loosely is a key skill for psychotherapists.

The truth is that when we think we know what is going on our tendency is to stop being open to other explanations and to stop noticing new information that may be important. 

I was trained to understand that the chief sense-maker in the room when I am working is not me, it is my client. It is my role to be observant, to notice and wonder, and to gently bring attention to that which may be useful to the client in helping them understand and change their lived experience. What I think I know is not so relevant, I spend 50 minutes a week with them and they live in their skin 24 hours a day 7 days a week, they really are the expert on themselves!

Staying open and curious and dancing with the unknown is the endeavour of psychotherapy. Helping clients to embrace the idea of multiple perspectives and knowing reality to be a construct that they can influence and consciously shape is important work. A dear trainer of mine used to talk of ‘wobbling the concrete’ - moving past what we strongly believe to be open to news of difference. Change comes from that openness, and clients seldom come to #therapy actually wanting to stay with what is happening now.

#Curiosity is a wonderful quality that we are born with and do well to keep cultivating all the way through our lives. Next time you are convinced of something and it’s holding you back, maybe ask yourself what information is there that you are not yet noticing. One thing I do know is that there is always more…

For #psychotherapy that goes beyond the obvious with a playful, curious way of being, get in touch at fjchrichard@gmail.com or on 01325 605160.