I was reminded recently of the contrast between feeling that I had some control over what happened to me, and of feeling as if life was just happening and I was a passenger along for the ride. It was prompted by an auto-pilot moment where I was imagining I just had to go along with something that was wholly unsatisfactory.
Fortunately for me, a colleague was able to challenge my thinking and remind me that I am not a passenger in my own life, I have choices and can exercise them. I felt so much better, and began to think about the options and my preferences, and how to bring influence to bear to make sure that what happened next was the best thing possible for all concerned.
Often it is easy to miss the impact we are able to have. This can bring about a feeling of helplessness, and even of hopelessness, which then shut down our thinking further, becoming a vicious cycle. Stopping this in its tracks by identifying what choices you can make, and what influence you can have, however limiting, can reverse this process and help you begin to feel a sense of agency and impact.
Life does not just happen to you. Everything you do or do not do, or say, has an influence on the world around you. Take a moment to ponder the choices next time you feel stuck.
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