“Introversion is not something you fix via extroversion. You fix it by seeing it as something not to be fixed. Let introversion exist. Allow journeys inward as well as outward.” Matt Haig
Introversion and extroversion are an indication of where we draw our energy from. Introversion indicates we are energised by drawing within, by reflecting and having time alone. Someone with an introverted preference may find too much focus on people and events over-stimulating, and will find some quiet to re-charge when this happens. This contrasts with an extroverted preference where energy comes from the outer world, from people and interaction, those with an extroverted preference may find quiet time and time alone challenging and uncomfortable.
In societal terms we seem to favour extroversion. The school system seems to value confidence, speaking up and interacting in groups as if they are better than contemplation and individual effort and achievement. Likewise in the world of work, and in social situations it can feel like a hierarchy more than being a difference of which both sides are valued.
What’s interesting is that introversion and extroversion are not an either/or. There may be some contexts in which we display one, and some contexts in which we display the other. We will each have our own balance of both, rather than living at one or other extreme.
I find that journeys within are essential to give meaning to the journeys out, and there is a grace that comes from the balance between. The most important thing perhaps is being aware of your own energy, knowing what is likely to impact it, and taking care to manage your vitality in ways that work for you. Not too much, not too little, continually adjusting for the levels and types of stimulation that enrich, and the patterns of introspection that enable.
In an extroverted world let’s celebrate our introversion, and value what it brings. The most important thing is to honour who and how we each are, knowing that when we act from authenticity, well-being will follow.
If you want to explore your way of being in the world to enrich your quality of life, get in touch for psychotherapy sessions.
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